Me personally and also this kid met online last may, and also been dating since june this past year. He explained inside the month that is first he previously despair.
One of the most significant reasons he had been drawn to me personally ended up being just just exactly how available i had been with thoughts and psychological state. He additionally liked just exactly just how i had been a caring and good individual (not to ever boast, simply offering context). He’s training to be a medical practitioner, and it’s really been busy. He were able to fit us set for face some time phone phone calls once or a few times a week, and additionally they had been so excellent. We are maybe not traditional by a long shot, but i’m a pretty independant individual, therefore just speaking by phone a couple of times a week doesn’t bother me personally, in reality, it is great! i love being distant from eachother by doing so we spend together so wonderful because it makes the time.
I know he is struggled since we have started, doing things such as for example maybe perhaps not chatting for a week, then finding its way back and apolagizing for their behavior, but i nevertheless encouraged him and was here for him. I delivered him messages everyday in which he stated it assisted a great deal. it made us feel closer truthfully.
Approximately half way through november, he stopped speaking once again. i begged him to inform me personally that which was incorrect, saying i had been hurting, and then he finally (reluctantly) said “george, i care in regards to you a great deal. iv’e just been away from i. idk, like i cant focus, my thoughts are shot. i’m simply numb to every thing. idk, i cant snap out of it. i’m sorry. i’m therefore sorry. idk i am f*****g up and i’m sorry”. i felt good once you understand it had been him rather than me personally, so i continued motivating him, confident that i could possibly be here for him because of the reason he had been acting distant now proven to me personally. Additionally, he got placed straight straight back on medicine for despair from the beginning of november (i thought it absolutely was well well worth mentioning because that might affect him somehow?).
2 times in he tried to reach out, saying “Thank you november. Tuesday i’m travelling. I’d prefer to talk Monday whenever we can. I’m sorry once more. Idk.” and “Thank you for many of the. The next day i travel house. I think I’m ok. Offer me personally yet another time?” in which he did not follow through on either of these. Did not react to any such thing, nevertheless the true point is he reached out, right?
He is stated things such as “I actually really dont deserve you” and “you’re absolutely wonderful” replying to random messages iv’e sent throught december, but never ever used anything up.
The very last message i got from him had been two times before chrisrtmas, saying “I have always been nearly done. You are missed by me” (i 
am almost done meaning his finals at uni). He has gotn’t stated any such thing since, in which he blocked me personally a days that are few. My heart shattered, but my logical brain simply cant make feeling of every of it. It simply does not make any feeling. He wont let me know any such thing. I KNOW he does not wish us to finish. I simply understand it. Deep in my own heart, know it i. I’m attempting to be strong, focus on myself, just ignore us for a whilst, then take to trying again in a month or two. I do not like to give up one thing therefore utterly wonderful. I understand he does not want it. Because he had a depressive period) we were absolutely fine before he distanced himself (which i know he did. We’d simply began face timing, instead of just calling, and we also had been dancing such a fantastic way. ABSOLUTELY NOTHING at that point made me think otherwise. I believe that this might be related to him. I dont know very well what’s going on though. It hurts probably the most being unsure of what the good explanation is. I dont desire to give up him. I cant.
Can somebody provide advice/support/positive support/encouragement/stories of a similar situation/if you’d a gf that attempted this hard for you personally although you had been for the reason that state, could you enjoy it over time.
Really, i’m harming, but i understand what i want and exactly exactly exactly what my heart understands holds true, and it is that this kid is mine and im his and i am never quitting on such a boy that is wonderful.